Monday, July 14, 2008

If you can't spell broodmare...

It's probably a sign you aren't qualified to breed horses. Today I decided to google the common misspellings of BROODmare to see what I could find, and boy, I found some doozies!

Here's a winner. Had no idea how to tell when the mare was going to foal, didn't have the common sense to board her at a facility that did, didn't pay attention, foal was born, rolled under fencing, ran into a cactus and turned himself into a foal shaped pincushion. Was found desperately trying to nurse from a trash can since he couldn't rejoin his mother. Dipshit Dora here writes about it all the web, oblivious to how close she came to having a dead foal and/or an injured mare.

And yeah, here we go, here's another byb'er of big horses, mini horses and puppies galore! I guess I should be happy they're showing at all, but jeez, it's 4-H. Not exactly a way to judge whether something is breeding quality. They have no eye. None at all, as shown by this baby yak they describe as "stunning." Um, well, I am kind of stunned...And why is there a blank where the sire should be? Are they not sure who he is?

Their stallion (I guess they gelded it now) is actually not that bad of a horse but the $25-at-the-auction totally out of style halter does him no favors. Sheesh people, at least borrow something good from a friend to take the picture. And pull his damn mane. He's not a reiner.

But hey, if you're not into horses, they also appear to have 15+ puppies for sale, including some so tiny you can "stick them in your pocket and GO!" Yay. I loooove you "teacup" breeders. You're my favorite. Of course I found them through an ad for a mare who MAY be in foal to their stallion. God forbid we call a vet and actually find out.

Project or Broadmare: Clover needs someone who has plenty of time to ride, that's what she needs. Translation: Clover is a batshit idiot, and maybe you can wear her ass out but I'm tired of trying, so gimme three grand and get this POS off my property!

All she's been used for is to pet on and breedmare. Of course she's grade, but hey, she's got blue eyes so I guess you can register her with the Blue Eyed Horse Association! I actually really like the front end on this mare...if we could just detach it and put it on another horse's back end!

Ad text: "Quarter horse cross. This is a very sweet laid back mare. Solid white with two blue eyes. She leads. Has been loaded in a trailer. Picks her feet up. Loves to be brushed and scratched. Easy keeper. She has only had ground work done with her and never been rode. All she has been used for is to pet on and breedmare. She also throws beautiful paint babies. She is not UTD on shots if interested you can have this done at your cost due to the price of her being so cheap. If you are interested please email June @ or call me (205)648-5640 please leave a message because I do not have caller ID."
I'm also wondering, given that she's only five years old, how many "beautiful paint babies" she's been asked to pop out! I am pleased to see that someone is considering upgrading her to a riding home. Hope it all works out!