Sunday, May 25, 2008

I have the perfect match for the picnic table from yesterday

An alert reader sent me this after some guy posted to say his mare had a foal by him. Even those of you who admit you don't have the best "eye" yet can see the problems here - roman nose, thick, short neck, straight shoulder, sickle hocked, and pig eyed.

His reasons for breeding to him?

* It was FREE

* He did not think anyone with nice stallions would take his unregistered mare

OK, sweetie, now that the fine folks at the forum have given you the smackdown on this, I want you to think through all of that. The reason people with "nice stallions" don't want to take your unregistered mare is that they want their horse's foals to have a solid value and a good chance of a good life. You are saying you are going to keep little Tupak (yes, my brain is bleeding that you named your colt after a dead rapper) forever, but $20 says you're under 25 and have no clue what is yet to happen to you in your life. Sometimes bad things happen - like unplanned pregnancy, health problems, or job loss. Sometimes good things happen - like an awesome job offer in NYC or meeting the love of your life who happens to live in France. Either way, you cannot guarantee you will be keeping this foal for life. None of us can. That's why we are so adamant about breeding something that other people will want if you can't keep it. If your colt turns out looking anything like Daddy, um, good luck.

The sad thing in this case is the mare, despite being grade, isn't that bad! She's much better put together than this stallion. This person managed to pick something out to breed to that was much worse than his own horse. But hey - the price was right!

I have a new fuglyism for these horses. Since they're all (or damn near) being bred because they're some kind of GUARANTEED color producer, we shall now call them hideozygous.