Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Happy ending my ass, you phony bitch

Apparently there is this Pulitzer Prize winning author named Jane Smiley who made as assload of money writing about racehorses, among other things. Her most famous book features a filly named Waterwheel, described as a "sexy, lightning-fast black filly." (Roll your eyes along with me now!) Well, a couple years post-publication, and publication of this interview where Jane tells everybody what a "happy ending" Waterwheel got, where do you suppose Waterwheel is?

Yup! You guessed it! Wound up at an auction where she sold - IN FOAL - for the princely sum of $1000. Which tells me she'd have been a $200 canner if she'd been open. (And yes, I do know that TB names may be duplicated particularly with imports...this is the same mare, you can see in this article that she states that Waterwheel is a Grindstone daughter.)

Jane is like so many people we all know. She says all the right things - "Every horse story is like a love story"...blah blah blah. But when it comes to taking care of the horse whose story put money in her pocket, a mare with a shitty race record, an undistinguished production record and a double-broken sesamoid - where is Jane? Where IS Jane? Well, nowhere to be found after contracting with some bloodstock agent to dump this poor mare at the auction.

Ms. Smiley is clearly more than successful enough to have given Waterwheel a home for life, as a pet if not as a broodmare. But like so many - she just didn't give a shit. She probably told herself the mare would "get a good home." She rationalized all the reasons for sending an eight year old mare who I'm guessing isn't riding sound and so far hasn't produced anything worthwhile down the road. It's a business, right, Jane? And I guess it wouldn't bother me so much if you just admitted that, but no. Not you. You say things like this:

(From the Washington Post)

"Smiley tries to prepare the reader for its basic softheartedness: She threatens that among other things she will sentimentalize her horses, even as she admits that harder-bitten horsemen resist the temptation. She says, "I am going to tell cute stories anyway, in the hope that an accumulation of cute stories will some day change the widespread human perception of horses as Cartesian machines, or lower beings, or unpredictable beasts, or selfish and insensate items of bulky furniture."

How eloquent! How sensitive! So why the FUCK didn't YOU treat your broken-down race mare like something more than a piece of furniture that no longer fit with your decor and had to go? Inquiring minds would like to know.

Waterwheel went to a lady named Marilyn Gursha. I sure hope Ms. Gursha is a more authentic horseperson than Jane Smiley. And Jane, if you want to respond to this blog, I'll be more than happy to publish your response. Hey, maybe I missed part of the story. If you died in an accident a month before the auction, you get a pass. But from where I'm sitting? You're just another shitty horse owner who dumps anything that is broken or fails to perform/produce up to expectations.

(Cue the trolls to come tell me HOW DARE I snark at her, she's spey-shul)