Thursday, May 22, 2008

Back to doing what we do best here at FHOTD...

Before I even begin, look here, Appy people, I don't hate them all. Hell I am pretty sure I own one (solid, grade but stripey feet and appy characteristics). I just hate that people produce tons of the fugly no-hipped wonders with stick tails and hammerheads and then don't train them to do a damn thing. If you'd like to argue that there's a market for them, why are all of this person's on sale at Blue Light Special prices? $800 for a foal and you can make payments!



You know why? BECAUSE ALMOST NOBODY THINKS THIS (see left) IS CUTE! Good Lord. That's face only a mother could love, and I'm not 100% sure about that.


Now, you MUST hear the description of this LOVELY creature that you can have for the low, low price of $500. This is everything I object to about backyard breeding, all in one place!

"SHE IS NOT BROKE TO RIDE BUT SHE IS BUILT FOR BARREL RACING. SHE IS WILD. SHE HAS BEEN FED AND WORMED REGULARLY IN HER FEED. HER FEET ARE NOT IN THAT BAD OF SHAPE CONSIDERING UNABLE TO CATCH FOR FERRIER. SHE WAS BRED TO OUR RED DUN STALLION, HEZA DUN LEGEND FOR SPRING 2008 AND SHE FOALED A BEAUTIFUL BUCKSKIN APPY FILLY THAT DIED BEFORE WE GOT HOME TO REMOVE THE SACK OFF OF HER FACE ON 3/1/08. SHE HAD LOTS OF MILK AND THREW A FIT WHEN WE DRAGGED HER BABY OUT SO SHE WOULD DEFINITELY BE A GOOD MOMMY. "


Holy living shit, where do I even begin? How did you discern she was a barrel prospect, because she runs like a bat out of hell any time you try to catch her? She's five years old, you admit she has NEVER had her feet done, you CANNOT catch her, so I'm guessing NO shots, NO vet care, but somehow it was a good idea to BREED her and then what do you know the baby died (how the Hell could you have helped the baby anyway with the mare this wild? Do you think Spotty WildAss would have been thrilled with that?) but hey it's OK 'cause you're BREEDING HER BACK! Hey, flip a coin, maybe this one will live! And breeding will settle her down, you know. At least we thought so last year but then we still couldn't catch her...hmmm. Maybe she needs to carry, like, twins, which I am sure will happen since god knows she'd kick the vet all the way to Nebraska if he tried to ultrasound her.

Oh, and in case you are being charitable and thinking that perhaps they recently acquired this mare and she's a rescue or has some other reason for being unhandled, um, no.

"SHE WAS BORN HERE, TIME JUST GOT AWAY FROM US WITH HIP SURGERIES, BUILDING A HOUSE, ETC. "

Did the house fall from the f'ing SKY like in The Wizard of Oz????? I suspect you knew in advance you were building a house. Why did you breed more than you could handle when you knew that? Excuses excuses excuses. You can afford to build a house but you cannot afford to hire some teenager to work with your foals? Give me a break.


Were you wondering what Ugly Betty up there is bred to? Here you go! He has all of the usual characteristics of a BYB's "Herd Sire." Let's see, he's nothing special in terms of conformation, mediocre pedigree (half of it's good, half of it's nothing special), and of course he's been breeding mares left and right without having ever actually accomplished a damn thing beyond impregnation in his life. Of course, I will say it's not exactly his fault - check out their tale of trying to break him out.





"SO FAR, HE'S JUST GREEN BROKE. I RODE HIM OUT IN AN OPEN PASTURE WITH MARES ON BOTH SIDES AND IT WAS ONLY THE 3RD TIME HE'D EVER BEEN SAT ON. HE WENT ALONG JUST FINE EXCEPT HE REARED UP AND STOOD THERE LOOKING AROUND (NEVER MOVED OUT OF HIS REAR TRACKS!) IT SEEMED LIKE 5 MINUTES BEING IN THE AIR. HIM AND I HAD A WHOLE CONVERSATION WHILE UP THERE-HA! FINALLY, HE DROPPED BACK DOWN AND WE CONTINUED RIDING FOR A FEW MINUTES. "





Man, do I feel GOOD about my "bad ride" yesterday which consisted of two "stopping and growing roots" incidents. At least MY three year old AQHA stallion does not think he is a f'ing Lippizan. And if he ever DID rear, I would not be laughing and thinking it was kyooot. Lord almighty, how DO these people reach adulthood?




I know a lot of you love it when I give you a clear example of conformation faults. Today we have post legs...and do we ever. See how the back legs are nearly straight up and down? Those legs scream "uncomfortable to ride" and "hock arthritis," and indeed the site says that they have "decided to keep for broodmare-due to hock issues..."


*headdesk* Her front pasterns are too upright also. To me, she even looks as though she is standing like things hurt, and have been hurting for a long time. I will bet those f'ed up hocks feel even better carrying a few hundred pounds of foal!



Where did I find this classic example of everything BYBesque? Why, over in the lovely land of HorseDopia, of course! Yup, everybody tells this chick how great her horses are, too! Just like our friend Missa from the other day! We may be "mean," but they're encouraging bad breeding and poor broodmare and foal care (there's also a great story from this dingbat about her losing a foal to joint ill...of course no mention of the VET being called) and breeding stuff you can't even ride...you know, I'd rather be mean than encourage irresponsibility that leads to suffering and death for horses.